I just don't know anymore... - Page 2

guitvai1 · #16 05-04-2007, 09:41 PM

Sorry to here about your relationship gone bad. I've had a few of these "party girls" too in my life and I almost understand your pain. My advice, get very far away and don't look back. They're selfish and no matter what happens they'll be looking out for #1 - Themselves.

sick-boy · #17 05-04-2007, 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HSH

Man, sorry to hear. Hope everything works out and you are o.k. I want to also say this, and please don't think I'm being insensitive, I'm really not trying to be, but it can be cathartic to write music/lyrics during times like these. Vent it out on paper, not people, if you feel like you need to scream or whatever. Just a thought. Good luck, man.

Way ahead of you dude. As soon as I get moved I'm going to get started. I have a very interesting chord progression that I was working on that was supposed to be "her song" but now I think that it will take on a whole new meaning. I'm actually looking forward to the amount of practice time that I can get in now. I think me and my RG are going to become good friends. Who knows? Maybe I will have enough time to move away from the pentonic, major, and minor scales and actually start learning some interesting things.

waylay00 · #18 05-04-2007, 09:52 PM

Man, that sucks....I'm younger than you, so don't take my word for it, but it sounds like you might have gotten married too early. I hope everything works out for you in the end though.

Edit: looks like JJEMMER beat me to it.

sick-boy · #19 05-04-2007, 10:10 PM

Just for the record, we both acknowledge that we got married way to early. I made the mistake of believing all the things that made me fall in love with her. The thing is, is that everything I told her is still true. I'm still the same person I was when she married me.

**jemsite** · #20 05-04-2007, 10:57 PM

That is a tough pill to swallow after a year but honestly chalk it up as a lesson learned and one not to repeat. Relish the fact that this headache can soon be gone.

Look, most every married male says "don't get married" but few ever explain just why. it's because marriage is unnatural, people change (especially the bride) and men and women just aren't really that compatible outside physical animal-like needs for the most part. And even when those moments are over the girl wants to lay and talk and "be held" when you want to go plug in your guitar

It's tough to be reduced to having 50% say in everything (at most), working, running a household and now having to deal with 100% more problems (your wives and yours) than you did when you were single or dating.

your story can be told 1000x and is as plain as day. You saw the wife to start a family with, she saw some sucker to babysit and walk over.

Quote:

Originally Posted by sick-boy

Luckily, I talked to my priest and he said that from the sounds of things it wouldn't be hard to get an annulment. That means I can remarry someday without being excommunicated. So now I just have to try to keep my head up and try to surround myself with family and friends to make it through these upcoming hard times.

you're going to be excommunicated from the forum if you dare to remarry anytime soon.

...glen

FloridaNative · #21 05-05-2007, 12:24 AM

Sick boy, I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through.

My heart just goes out to you. I know how it is to be in a relationship where the person you think you married pulls a Mr. Hyde on you. My best advice to you is to go with your gut instinct. I hesitated when my instincts told me to get out and now I am paying for it. I've been in a bad marriage for 10 years now. I am intensely unhappy almost all the time and there is no way out for me anymore. So if you have a chance to make a clean break, I say take it before it's too late. I wish you all the best. (gives Sick boy a great big hug and a rum runner).

JJEMMER777 · #22 05-05-2007, 01:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jemsite

you're going to be excommunicated from the forum if you dare to remarry anytime soon.

...glen

Wow.....do I detect just a very slight hint of "bitterness" there, glen??

guitar_chick · #23 05-05-2007, 07:18 AM

Sick-boy,

I feel really bad for you. I too am divorced. I violated many of the rules mentioned by Jim. I got married on my 22nd birthday to a man I only knew for 4 months. We were married almost 7 years, and we were total strangers. There was little physical affection in my marriage and when I wanted to go to college, he didn't want to let me. That is actually one argument that I won.

I got divorced in 1998, and it never seems to get any easier. I joke and flirt a lot, but I'm the dating type, and nobody appears to do this anymore. Guys can't wait to tell me that they don't want to date anyone. So, now you know why I am on here a lot lately. I had a guy stand me up a week ago, but I don't even care. He's probably a jackass anyways.

I agree with what several guys said, that it is hard, but it is better for you to know now, and move on with your life. I feel like I wasted my youth, my 20's, with a man that didn't appreciate me. I've been told that I've grown into a better person having had the whole experience, but I wonder sometimes if it has not just made me a little harder in life. I used to have some of the innocence of a child, but I have lost that side of me.

Now, I fend for myself. I live alone, but I am not lonely, like I was in a loveless marriage.

I don't want to drone on; you've heard it already. My baby brother just got a divorce. I wish the very best life has to offer for you.

guitar_chick · #24 05-05-2007, 07:32 AM

P.S. - Don't do anything rash like I did. I thought I could escape all my problems by running off and joining the Army right after my divorce. I had my 30th birthday in basic training. That sort of thing just comes back to bite you in the ass in the long run. I did have some fun moments though.

andy7jem · #25 05-05-2007, 07:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jemsite

And even when those moments are over the girl wants to lay and talk and "be held" when you want to go plug in your guitar

ROTFLMAO

JJEMMER777 · #26 05-05-2007, 07:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by guitar_chick

Now, I fend for myself. I live alone, but I am not lonely, like I was in a loveless marriage.

Serious words of wisdom there

sick-boy · #27 05-05-2007, 11:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jemsite

you're going to be excommunicated from the forum if you dare to remarry anytime soon.

...glen

Well, I'm still looking to settle down someday. Key word was someday. I just meant that things in the future for me didn't look all that bad. Believe me, I'll never get hitched after I've known someone for two months again. And I don't even want to hear anyone comment on the two months. I already know. Let's not beat a dead horse here.

guitar_chick · #28 05-05-2007, 12:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JJEMMER777

Serious words of wisdom there

Yeah, sometimes even the village idiot, such as myself, can slip up and accidentally say something sort of profound on a rare occasion. Is there a full moon?

shredmaster · #29 05-05-2007, 03:04 PM

I'm really sorry you are going through this man. it's terrible. A few of my friends are going through this as well...divorce talk. I never thought a couple of them would do it since their relationship was great...but things happen. A friend of mine was supposed to get married in 2 weeks. I was to shoot the wedding for them. He left a vmail for me last weekend saying the wedding is off...she just left to do errands and came back to tell him she can't do it, and then left, no explanation. They were living together for 2 years. I thought they were perfect. As you may or may not know, I had huge issues in my marriage. We dated for 6 years before getting hitched and lived together for 2 years. Long story short, her kid was the root of all evil and decided to be more of a f'n brat after we married. My wife, wanting to be more a friend than a disciplinary parent...caused many issues. Some issues are still there and always will be with this kid...I can't control everything. We were close to divorce about 6 months ago. I still think a 12 year old shouldn't have a cell phone but we won't go there. Things are better but she still needs to work on her daughter. I will agree with those who say if you do it, you will be better off. Just like any ending-relationship, it sux in the beginning but once it's done and you start healing, it is all good. In the future you will think, why didn't i get out sooner. Everyone changes and i really have to say, it's the chick who changes the most. Best of luck to you man....