Im Loosing It !? :(

Claws · #1 03-06-2010, 04:31 PM

Hi Guys!
First of all.. i want to thank all the great people's here for theyr support and help. This IS one of the best, peaceful forums ever!

To my little of topic issue..
I have been playing guitar with great interest since i was 12 years old..
I am now 32...
My guitar/gear have been untouched for 3 month's.
I have lost my passion?
I got divorced 2 years ago... and off-course i got a new girlfriend very fast.
After my new girlfriend came in the picture..
She likes all music that is not rock/jazz/metal.
So whenever i pick up my guitar to play i feel every tone is horribly boring..
Maybe because i feel she gets bored...
or i feel i play the same thing over and over again..
The same boring things... boring sound.. boring patch..

Help me out guys.. my fingers are getting rusty..
Is there anyone who have experienced something close.

speedy mcfeely · #2 03-06-2010, 04:44 PM

Go buy a Tele. I got bored with the same ol' strat sound a few years ago. So I bought a Squier Classic Vibe 50's Telecaster. It was like a new and exciting feeling. The tele is so unforgiving in some areas, but the sound is raw, and bright. Plus you can work on some Brent Mason licks, chicks get weak in the knees over killer country pickin'.

I understand your skepticism, you'll just have to trust me on this one... Tele.

LonePhantom · #3 03-06-2010, 04:55 PM

Don't worry about if your lady is not in to the same music. You play music for yourself. My wife doesn't really like most music I play, but that's not going to stop me playing it.

If you want to breathe new life in to your playing, get out and jam with people. Put an ad on local classifieds, boards or what ever. I was getting a bit stagnant with my playing, so I did that. I'm now writing music with another guy, and will be looking to put together a full band soon.

Robstar · #4 03-06-2010, 05:15 PM

Ok. First of all it sounds like you are projecting this feellings on to yourself because of the trauma of your life at his point.
1. Has she told you she is bored with your playing? Or are you just" feeling it".
2. Don't let anyone tell you what you should play. Unless you are taking lessons and your teacher tells you and you want to grow musically.
3.Get a guitar teacher in another style like a country player or a jazz player , whatever your 2nd choice of playing style is. It will do wonders for your playing.
4. Buy a different guitar from what you already have. It will force you to adapt your playing and gives you an incentive to practice more.

Good luck my friend and never give up playing music it is gift that a lot of other people do not have.

corey j grieve · #5 03-06-2010, 11:47 PM

I too lost inspiration and quit playing for 4 years!!!!! 4 F@#$%N years!!!! Lost!!!

But it's constant calling brought me back and i became better than before.
And within 1 year i was touring nationally and recording an album.
I'm pissed i lost those years,but it was obviously what i needed to progress.

The fact you posted this thread means you were meant to play the instrument!
Go to youtube and watch other great player's,get a jam buddy or teacher and become inspired.

The feeling of creating music is the same regardless of venue.
whether it's a stadium or a bedroom,the enjoyment is the same and is shared by all who play.
Go pick it up and go for it.

Mr. Killer · #6 03-07-2010, 01:21 AM

That's a period of time every guitar player goes through. It can last days, weeks, months, even years. Here is a list of things I do when I'm through that period and want to end it:

- Listen to music genres you have never listened before
- Listen to new bands that play the music you like
- watch some music dvds (G3 is recommended)
- If you have friends who play any instrument, try to do a little jamming with them, only for fun
- go to concerts

There are a bunch of things not related to music that I also do like:

- read books
- watch movies
- go out with family/friends
- play videogames
- and just lay in the ground and look at the sky

I can see you're worried. That means that you really wanna play, but you don't know how to get the courage to pick up the guitar again. Don't worry. Hopefully my advices will be useful. Take care man!

Rotti · #7 03-07-2010, 11:03 AM

Maybe get into some acoustic playing. Learning really good acoustic guitar stuff can be very rewarding.

Fantomas · #8 03-07-2010, 01:20 PM

It's probably just a phase. I had the same, have been playing for 20+ years and all of a sudden I just felt that I had been running in circles. It seemed I was just endlessly playing the same exercises, same kinds of music etc etc, and once I realized I wasn't going to find a great band soon (i had just quit my last band). I just lost interest. So I put my guitar in it's rack and spent 3 years doing completely other stuff, maybe picked up the guitar once a week for an hour or so (instead of the regular 3 hours a day) and just let it go for a bit.

About 3 months ago the urge returned and I am back to my old schedule again, took me a few weeks to get my speed ( and callouses) back, but I'm having great fun again. Absolutely no remorse about the break I took.

Remember, playing should be fun. If it isn't anymore, there is nobody forcing you to keep on it. Take that break, if you've been playing for that long you will definitely return to the instrument.

Claws · #9 03-07-2010, 03:37 PM

I am so surprised for all the reply's...
Thank you all !

I dont feel alone ... and i will take some of those tips here with me!

crush · #10 03-07-2010, 04:06 PM

I know how that feels too! I've been playing since I was 14 (I'm 27 now). And even though I don't consider myself a good player (at all), I still do it for the fun of it (I'm what we call a "bedroom player"). I'm going through a very rough time in my life and keeps me from wanting to pick my guitar and play. Every time I do it, I feel the same as you... same boring tracks, same boring set-up (even though I have a JEM7DBK, a Vox Tonelab LE and a Peavey Valveking 212 that sounds amazing!), same boring patch, etc... It's very tough to realize that you actually don't wanna play at all.
But, on the other hand, it doesn't mean you wanna give up playing for good. Perhaps, you just have to take a break. There's nothing wrong with it, and nobody will judge you for it (I'm saying this because sometimes, we can get that feeling). Take a break from the instrument and go out there and do other stuff.
Sometimes, when I feel that way, I go to the mountains. There's nothing like a few days in the cold air of the mountains to get your mind free of worries and fears. When I get back, there's nothing I want to do more than playing my guitar! And usually, I feel so good about playing againg that I start experimenting with differents sounds, techniques, etc.
I know that's just my way to deal with it... but if it works with me... it could work with you too. But, whatever you want to do, do it with absolute conviction. And as I said before, don't feel bad for not wanting to play right now... we all go through that once in a while. You just have to deal with it in the way that suits the best.
I hope you feel better soon, man!

Cheers!

ironheadtom · #11 03-07-2010, 05:00 PM

I'm almost 50 (only been playing for a dozen years or so) and I lost interest for a couple of years as well. (I was going through some life changes at that time also) I've picked it back up and I'm really enjoying it lately. I agree with the others that maybe you shouldn't worry about the GF's taste in music. I may be lucky though...my wife has a room for her hobbies and I have one for mine, so I can just close the door and rock out. Do you have room to create your own space ? The other posts about jamming with others and going back for lessons are great too, but you can't force it. Maybe need a little time till your heart's back in it.

shredmaster · #12 03-15-2010, 04:05 PM

It could be a phase. I'm in the same boat in a way and I hate thinking about it to tell you the truth. Started playing when I was 15. I kind of stopped at age 26 and I'm 38 now. The first 8 years I played 4 hours a day most days while in highschool. Weekends about 8 hours a day. I loved it so much! Recorded all the time.

Around age 24 I was slowing down, not getting attention, bands I was in were getting nowhere and everyone wanted to do lame coverband stuff. I exhausted all my avenues, placed ads all the time, came up short. A couple years later my love for photography and video took over and were more satisfying. i didn't need to spend hours to get a nice shot, as I would a great riff!

Moving from apartment to townhome, getting married, working on townhome, day job, then moving to house, having our son...well, I don't have much time now. I hate saying this but I let 11 years go by and that really bothers me!!!

I cancelled all advertising in photo / video mid-2009, relying only on website and word of mouth. I have a project coming up where I'm going to be recording a 3-song demo with a couple friends and we're filming a music video too....fun time for us. It's all for fun now.

At times it really bothers me that I will not be Paul Gilbert status and that 11 years melted away. I'm the kind of person where it has to be all or nothing and I've been nothing for a long time. Not being really good takes the fun away for me. Never in competition with anyone else, only me. If I can't devote hours to it, I don't want to do it....that's just me. I'm trying to change that.

Good luck to you!

**GilkyBear** · #13 03-15-2010, 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rotti

Maybe get into some acoustic playing. Learning really good acoustic guitar stuff can be very rewarding.

This right here! Everyone loves the sound of a decent acoustic guitar and it is great exercise.

shredmaster · #14 03-15-2010, 09:13 PM

good point. if you can get your chops up on an acoustic, electric will fly. i have been noodling around on the classical for picking. i don't like the way it sounds half the time but it's good practice.

mike570 · #15 03-15-2010, 09:31 PM

I stopped playing somewhere in 2001 and didn't really pick up the guitar until 2005. I was just burnt. Playing guitar started feeling like a job and I wasn't happy with anything I was playing. I was also a bit tired of wrangling people in the band and getting people motivated.
So, I started writing novels. The first two were kind of.... eh. Working on the third and fourth novel simultaneously. Now I have two hobbies that eat my time.
My interest in guitar came back in 2005. I was stuck without power for a while after Hurricane Wilma so I picked up the guitar again. I was also exciting to see all the cool stuff one could do recording on the PC. In general, though, I just became interested in music again.
I think my mind needed the break. It might seem counterintuitive, but maybe the right thing to do is to hang it up for a while. I don't feel like I lost time. It's more like this is the natural progression of things. When I came back to the guitar I felt better than ever. My sonic pallet seemed to grow by leaps and bounds. I felt inspired again, which I guess is the important part really.
Hope that makes sense. Best of luck!