In a side note - it does sound like you prefer to have smaller frets? and 100$ for a refret is close to nothing. If you can get used to larger frets, they generally tend to be "faster" and easier to play. At least that's the most common view on them! But all to his own. Mostly it's just down to what you prefer
And well, I'd also suggest 10's anyway! I used 9's many years ago, then switched up to 10's. I've never regretted doing that. I think you get a fatter tone and it's nice with that extra little bit of tension when you bend.'
So well, what would I do in your position?
Assuming that I would have the same preferences as you, I'd change to 10s, refret it (If it's that cheap for you, that is) and -perhaps- also work on my technique, trying to learn to play with a slightly lighter touch. Not only because you play faster, that's more to me a side bonus. But because you won't stress the muscles in your hand more than you need to. But, it might require more practice than what it's worth. You should try changing your playing style slightly, but if it's too much of a time-consumer, it's really not worth it. Then it's better that you play creative stuff and have fun
I think, at least!
Good luck
