Band Etiquette?

Two hands31 · #1 02-07-2004, 01:49 AM

I'm in a bit of a situation, there's been posters up for about a week now at my school (Fanshawe College) looking for a lead guitarist for a band that sounds interesting to me (has rehearsal space I'd have to help pay for, has a demo CD already and will start writing new material when new guitarist joins, influences listed were Orgy, Prong, 30 Seconds to Mars, Cradle of Filth and others), problem is I'm already in a band, but it's moreso me and some friends who have jammed a couple of times but are looking for a drummer and time to practise and a place to practise, and are basically getting no where, as well as a "band" with another friend (we jam a lot and have written a "song" or two).

My question is, would it be wrong to contact this other band? I'm thinking I'd e-mail the guy who put up the posters to express interest in joining and ask for some samples of their music to listen to so I could see if I'd be interested. My only worry is if it'd be considered ditching my friends.

Soup Kitchen Studios · #2 02-07-2004, 01:57 AM

Um.. no problems here. Luckily music isn't monogamous! Play with as many people as you have the time and energy for. Sleep with one.

revsharp777 · #3 02-07-2004, 04:03 AM

After a long stint with my band, we decided to break up last week. We did it in such a way that we were able to stay close friends.

It really all depends on what you want to do with your music. Do you just want to jam, or are you trying to turn your music into a career? Here's a rule you need to live by: "Friends are friends, but business is business." Learn to separate the two. If your goals in music are different than the goals of the people you're currently playing with, it's time to move on. Once you explain this to your friends, they'll most likely back your decision. After all, that's what REAL friends are for! You just need to be honest with them.

First, ask the other band for a sample of their music so you an decide if they are what you're looking for.

Secondly, if you decide you want to join this new band, talk with your old band & let them know why you're doing this. Again, if they are your REAL friends, they should understand.

Thirdly, if you still have gigs booked with your old band, do the right thing by finishing out the gigs that have been booked.

Doing all of the following should translate into a smooth transition for you....and you'll be able to keep your friends. It's all about treating the situation & others with respect. I hope this helps.

weserman · #4 02-07-2004, 08:27 AM

can't you just be in two bands at once? I don't see what is wrong with doing that. The drummer and keyboardist/guitarist from my band are in another band. Also, I have just started another band with the other guitarist from my band, so now i am in two and he is in three. There haven't been any problems so far. Its a good way of being able to play a wide range of music.

OME · #5 02-07-2004, 09:48 AM

I 2nd revsharp's advice.

What are you looking for out of your music, two hands?
You shooting for the stars or just having fun?

weserman, I'd like to hear your bands cover of jump......

babahi · #6 02-07-2004, 10:45 AM

Great advice from everybody here; let the 1st band know if and when you decide to play with others. And there really is no rule that says you can only play in one band. Music is supposed to be fun!

Proxi · #7 02-07-2004, 10:46 AM

RevSharp's comment is right on the money.

You maybe able to play in two or more bands depending on how you handle it. But if you're really serious in what you're doing musically, you will eventually have to choose which is your main band.

Good luck,
~Pr
www.lyranthe.com

Drew · #8 02-07-2004, 02:53 PM

"Friends are friends, but buisness is buisness..." Yes and no. I agree in principle, but I find I write better when working with people I know and like. Oh well...

I second basically what everyone else has said- join both. Maybe check with your friends first to see if they'd mind if you played in another band as well, and then in the following weeks just do little things to make sure they know you're serious about keeping both projects alive- bring in a new riff, or just take the initiative setting a practice date or something. Show them that you still want to play with them, but that you want to play with some other people too.

I've always felt that the more people you can jam with, the better- it'll show you new musical territories that you might not have found had you not been playing with a set of musicians trying to push a different set of musical boundaries than the ones you're used to.

-D

revsharp777 · #9 02-07-2004, 06:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Drew

"Friends are friends, but buisness is buisness..." Yes and no. I agree in principle, but I find I write better when working with people I know and like. Oh well...

My "friend is friends..." quote was geared to when your facing a problem with the band. Of course, you want to play in a band with people you like. I was saying that when you're dealing with a band problem, you need to look at the situation as a friend AND as a businessman (for those who are trying to get somewhere with their music).

Drew · #10 02-19-2004, 03:47 PM

That i agree to.

I think we're on the same wavelength...

darren wilson · #11 02-19-2004, 04:59 PM

If you're treating being in a band as "business" it won't be much fun. My band just imploded this week as well, because we stopped having fun a long time ago.

Do what makes you happy, keep the lines of communication open, and make sure all members of your first band knows that every one of them has total creative freedom to pursue outside collaborations or do stuff on their own.

vaijem777 · #12 02-19-2004, 07:04 PM

As long as you conduct yourself correctly, there should be no problems at all.

The band that I've been with steadily for the past 3 years is taking a "break" right now. I can't stand just sitting around not playing, so I'm doing work with a couple of other groups off and on in the meantime. To me, the most important thing is being able to maintain a friendship with the other band members (but only because I actually like 'em!).

I do kind of look at it as a business though...it's not a good thing to develop a reputation as a total a$$hole, so I try to treat everybody that I deal with as I'd like them to treat me

That said...have fun! You're young- no sense in limiting yourself to a single project. If the other guys don't understand and take offense to it, then just do what feels rigth to you.

Anton · #13 02-19-2004, 07:29 PM

go for it dude! you only live once , im sure they wouldn't mind if you joined another band , although i would be conscious of making sure you didnt skip rehursals to do stuff with your other band , then things will turn nasty

peace
-A

Two hands31 · #14 02-20-2004, 06:47 AM

Turns out the other band isn't quite what I'm looking for anyways, and they already found someone. On the other side of things, my other band may be practising more regularily and looking for a drummer soon

Drew · #15 02-22-2004, 02:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Two hands31

...and looking for a drummer soon

What do you mean, "looking for a drummer SOON?" C'mon dude, you know you want a drummer, you made the decision to find one- what else needs to be done before you start looking? No procrastination here, get those posters up!

-D