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View Poll Results: Who'd win in a fight.
Yoda. 18 69.23%
Santa. 8 30.77%
Voters: 26. You may not vote on this poll

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post #1 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 04:06 PM Thread Starter
 
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Ridiculous question.

Ok this is just an amazingly odd question. Who'd win in a fight. Santa or Yoda. Santa can have any weapon made for him by the elves (including Jedi weapons) and Yoda is, well, Yoda I guess. What with the new Star Wars movie and all I though it might be fun.
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post #2 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 04:07 PM
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

Isn't Yoda an elf?
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post #3 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 04:09 PM Thread Starter
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

Damn that was a fast reply. No Yoda is not an elf.
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post #4 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 04:11 PM
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

well they are both slow LOL but i would give the rising hand to santa for the given reasons , but if santa is the 50-60 yr old beer guzzlin meat swab at the local mall parades well i would have to change my answer.

p.s. Sorry Santa we all love you
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post #5 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 04:16 PM
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

geez, this is a tough one. there are too many variables.

for my money, i'd need to know how it started. was it over a girl? did santa catch yoda in the sack with mrs clause making sweet, sweet jedi love?

if that were the case, i'd be backing the big guy. and if things turned nasty, i'd step in for him too. there's nothing more despicable than a green midget hitting your wife.
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post #6 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 05:05 PM
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ralsch
well they are both slow
Yoda too slow? Disagree, didnt you see the jedi master's moves in Attack Of The Clones? The only chance Santa would have is if he used the dark side of the force, Darth Claus, sounds kinda crap!!!!
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post #7 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 05:12 PM
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gurj
Yoda too slow? Disagree, didnt you see the jedi master's moves in Attack Of The Clones? The only chance Santa would have is if he used the dark side of the force, Darth Claus, sounds kinda crap!!!!
LOL

darth claus! lol
ok, someone MUST photoshop this

[on topic]

i voted yoda, because i'd sooner believe in a little green ancient wielder of the force than a big fat ancient giver of gifts.
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post #8 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 05:57 PM
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

lol i still think they are both up to the same speed , using teleportation and other methods of moving.The golly old giver will have some dirty things up his sleeves (alot in that matter) for yoda sleeping with his wife. the force yoda now knows is santa's big red boot up is ROUND 1 ding ding ding lol.
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post #9 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 06:33 PM
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

This IS a very odd question, indeed. I've seen Santa fight before and even though he can move quite well for someone his size, I still think that Yoda would lay the smack down on him (and if you haven't seen Yoda fight in "Attack of the Clones" then atleast check him out in Star Wars: Clone Wars which aired on Cartoon Network and which may still be up on their website.)
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post #10 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 06:50 PM
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

Of course LittleGreenMan would win
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post #11 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 07:00 PM
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

Yoda. Fast with that light saber
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post #12 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 07:29 PM
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Flobanez
Yoda. Fast with that light saber
Is that what Santa's wife said?
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post #13 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-11-2005, 10:03 PM
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

Are we talking Santa or Bad Santa (from the movie with Billy Bob Thornton)? Bad Santa would stomp Yoda, who aparrently is the bastard offspring of one of Santa's own elves and the toxic avenger. Bad Santa is "good in a fight because I'm so drunk I don't feel a thing." Yoda is a puppet - and when filming is completed for the day he's thrown into a sack.
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post #14 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-12-2005, 12:38 PM Thread Starter
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

Ok let me set the scene. Yoda and Santa are set to meet in a bar about the distribution of Star Wars action figures. Yoda arrive early and orders a drink at the bar.

Bartender; "Sorry, are you old enough to drink?"
Yoda; "Nine hundred years old Yoda is."
Bartender; "Yeah well I need some ID."
Yoda; "Here."
Bartender; "Holy Christ you weren't kidding!"
Yoda; "Scotch on the rocks I will have thanks."
Bartender; "Yes sir, right away."

Yoda looks to his left and sees a woman. He spots a ring on her finger but he senses she's unhappy.

Yoda; "Evening is good madam."
Woman; "Yes well."
Yoda; "Sense you are unhappy I do."
Woman; "Its my husband, hes never home."

Conversation progresses and Santa walks in. Yoda realises the woman is his wife and Santa becomes ferociously jealous. They challenge each other to a duel.

As such Santa is not wrong nor is Yoda. He didn't know.
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post #15 of 27 (permalink) Old 05-12-2005, 12:52 PM
 
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Re: Ridiculous question.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tom Gilroy
Conversation progresses and Santa walks in. Yoda realises the woman is his wife and Santa becomes ferociously jealous. They challenge each other to a duel.

As such Santa is not wrong nor is Yoda. He didn't know.
so i was right - it IS over a woman.

although yoda isn't necessarily in the wrong here (after all, mrs clause was wearing knee high boots), santa's motivation towards fighting will be quite different. he'll be fighting to restore his manhood... his dignity. he has nothing to lose now. yoda is only fighting to fend off santa's trademark "chimney sweep" punch combo.

plus yoda has already had a drink. although this will instill in him a heightened sense of fighting prowess, the reality is that his co-ordination is already suffering. given yoda's body mass, and assuming the bartender served him a regular sized drink, he has in fact consumed close to three standard drinks.

(this is what happens when you retire at thirty. this is what my life has come to. contributing to threads like this one...)
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