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You know you're addicted to guitars when...

19K views 111 replies 80 participants last post by  michblanch 
#1 ·
You know you're addicted to guitars when:


- You turn the bathroom tap and listen for a change in pitch as you turn it.

- Upon hearing someone say "We'll cross that bridge when you get to it", you imagine minature people clambering over one of the bridge saddles on a Fender Telecaster.

- You're with your friends talking about the recent shark sightings and your mind keeps coming back to the inlays in the neck of your Ibanez.

- You're writing a Christmas card to Mr Floyd down the street, and write "Mr Floyd Rose" on the envelope by accident.

- You mention breaking a g-string without thinking about what you're saying. People get the wrong idea, but you meant the 3rd string on a guitar.

- You hear a pinging sound and instantly think your string retainer's broken, even though your guitar is not with you.

- You think Maple Syrup is meant to be used for cleaning maple fretboards.

- You're writing a Christmas card to your neighbour Les, and write "Les Paul" on the envelope by accident.

- If anyone mentions anything being overpriced you automatically think "Gibson guitars".

- You spend your spare time making picks out of ice-cream container lids.

- You've made so many picks out of ice-cream container lids that you've run out of lids and start making them out of milk bottles.


Anyone else got some?
 
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#3 ·
You know you're addicted to guitars when:

- You turn the bathroom tap and listen for a change in pitch as you turn it.

- Upon hearing someone say "We'll cross that bridge when you get to it", you imagine minature people clambering over one of the bridge saddles on a Fender Telecaster.

- You're with your friends talking about the recent shark sightings and your mind keeps coming back to the inlays in the neck of your Ibanez.

- You're writing a Christmas card to Mr Floyd down the street, and write "Mr Floyd Rose" on the envelope by accident.

- You mention breaking a g-string without thinking about what you're saying. People get the wrong idea, but you meant the 3rd string on a guitar.

- You hear a pinging sound and instantly think your string retainer's broken, even though your guitar is not with you.

- You think Maple Syrup is meant to be used for cleaning maple fretboards.

- You're writing a Christmas card to your neighbour Les, and write "Les Paul" on the envelope by accident.

- If anyone mentions anything being overpriced you automatically think "Gibson guitars".

- You spend your spare time making picks out of ice-cream container lids.

- You've made so many picks out of ice-cream container lids that you've run out of lids and start making them out of milk bottles.

Anyone else got some?
You buy StarWars Tazos just to carve them into Picks even though your a 33 yr old man.

You constantly convince yourself that you need more then one guitar to play guitar.

You wake up each day, and you check Jemsite before you brush your teeth.

Your wife knows more about Ibanez Guitars then most of your friends...

Every move in life is another step towards buying another guitar...
 
#4 ·
....your friend tells you he was in a Fender bender - and you think /Stratocaster jam.

...you get pissed off every time you hear someone tell you they are good at 'Guitar Hero'

...you REALLY AND TRULY consider dumping your girl when she's mad at you for rehearsing with the band.

~j
 
#6 ·
You justify not paying the rent by "needing a single coil strat"

Youd rather listen to a Hendrix cd rather then the Mrs...

On that topic of the mrs knowing more about ibanez etc she went to work and started a conversation with a work friend that plays guitar and started to quiz him and well it turns out she knows alot more about Mixolyidan, G3, Steve vai, floyd rose and ibanez them him.
 
#7 ·
... When you bring a girlfriend home, the first thing she remarks on is your guitar gear.

... You wait impatiently for christmas because you know you're getting a new stompbox.

... You start telling your mates stuff about the guitar you've built, despite the fact they're clearly not interested / don't understand what the hell you're talking about.

... You're giving a kid a guitar lesson and you think, "Nah, you don't want to learn that, LEARN THIS! *intense shredding in the mind*"

... One whole side of your room is covered by guitars, amps, posters, tickets and other gig memorabilia (I'm almost there, just need to move the rugby stuff first)

... You don't want the cleaner to do anything in your room in case she damages your guitar stuff.

... You spend about 10 minutes thinking up ways of knowing that you're addicted to guitars (which you should be spending on maths papers)

... People scroll through the artists on your iPod and ask, "Who the f*ck even ARE these people?"
 
#9 ·
... when your final major project for a Graphic Design degree turns into a guitar mag.

... when your girlfriend accuses you of spending more time with your guitar.

... when your idea of "gospel music" is Sex and Religion.

... when you live off noodles for a month in order to save money for a new pedal.

... when half of your student loan installment goes on a new amp.

... when you find yourself inadvertently fingering modes on the edge of your desk at work.
 
#18 ·
...you've ever thoroughly cleaned any one guitar more times in a given month than the toilet(s) in your house...

...your monthly GAS bill is higher than your monthly gas bill...

...you have more pedals than your wife has pieces of jewelry...

...you easily remember the year/factory or origin/specs of your Ibby's, but you cannot seem to recall the birthdays of close family members...

...your wife snidely refers to any of your guitars as "that shameless hussy"...

...you've ever actively participated in a discussion like this one...

;)
 
#19 ·
......you "forget" that 400 bucks was for groceries, just because you find a dy 550 in the pawn shop....

.........your fiancee tells you that you play better drunk because you don't "practice" as much and just make music....

........when you have the guest bedroom as your studio.....and the guests sleep on a futon.....
 
#20 ·
when youtalk about guitars every day, to anyone, doesnt matter who it is.

when your girlfriend gets pissd off when you talk about guitars.

when you finish making a guitar you think about how youre going to build the next one, and how its going to be better than the one you have just made.
 
#22 ·
-when planning your home fire escape plan, and the 1st thing you think of is how many guitars you can extricate from your house as rapidly as possible.

-When dreams of your favorite guitar being stolen wake you up in a cold sweat (just happened 2 nights ago)
 
#37 ·
When:


-You tell your guitar buddies that you're "definately" going to get a different new piece of gear every week.

-Every week, you explain to your guitar buddies why you didn't get the gear you said you were.

-You buy better headphones for your computer just so you can better hear the differences in pickup tones on Seymour Duncan's or DiMarzio's websites.

-You know what AANJ, EBMM, ADK, FR, 550, 570, PMC, DNA, PUP, CA and all other assortments of acronyms mean without ever seeing the words actually associated with the letters.

-You fall asleep while the modeling vs. tube debate is going on in your head.

-You fall asleep to the trem or hardtail debate going on in your head.

-You fantasize about changing PUPs, pickgaurds, tuners, knobs and switches.

-You show your wife a new guitar that you've designed on kisekae or Valdex V-RG builder every other day.

-You won't consider one brand just because it's "too popular."

-During your lunch break you draw scetches of what your pedal board and rack would look like if you had unlimited funds and/or were in a big touring intrumental progressive rock band.

-You like instrumental progressive rock.

-You think instrumental progressive rock is a viable career path.

-Half of your iTunes library consists of music without words.

-You know the name of more than 10 guitar companies.

-You know the name of 5 types of tremelo bridges, ad why they are different.

-You actually save your D'Addario strings pack for the players points and use them to buy DAddario shirts, beanies and so on.

-You own a D'Addario piece of clothing.

-One of your musical heros is named "Guthrie."

-You like living Italian virtuosos.

-House hunting actually becomes a debate for why you need a spare room all to yourself and the kids should share a room.

That's all for now.
 
#40 ·
-You know the name of more than 10 guitar companies.
I thought that was pretty standard... my mistake...

When:

... You mess up the paint on your project guitar, so have to start again but don't mind as it's just more practice for the one you're gonna do next.

... You have to consider whether to spend your money on a new pedal or a year's gym membership.
 
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